An unexpected request



What would you do if after meeting a fabulous person, while out with friends, that you are totally attracted to, calls you after and says:

"Hi, I really like you and I would like to have a sexual relationship with you. Nothing more, nothing less."

What would you say?

I'd like to examine this question, because at first glance or upon hearing the question your first reaction is probably along these lines:

“What kind of person says that? What could they be thinking? What did I say or do that would make them think I would even be interested in such a situation?”

The reality is that it probably has nothing to do with you other than the person admiring something in you that they would like consent to explore with you. It's much more flattering than a person pretending to want more but all along it was always only sex they wanted.

You see, we forget that honesty is pure and complimentary and even though we may be a tad perturbed by the statement, it's really the ego that gets in the way. I say look at the pros and cons of your situation before you categorically say no. Because remember you have the power. You have the power to say yes or no to them if and when you want, where and when you want. It could be perfect for you at this time (or the timing could be totally off) but the great thing is you have the ability and the power to choose.

Let's look at some of the pros and cons.

Pros

  • This maybe a busy time in your life and a relationship right now may not be the best thing.

  • You can begin or end it when YOU want.

  • You can even set up some boundaries - is just friends with benefits or will there be a few drinks or coffees out as friends.

  • This could be a fun situation without the pressure or stress that relationships can sometimes bring to the table.

Cons

  • Can you handle it emotionally? You have to put your feelings on hold - are you capable of doing that?

  • You have to be honest and think about how you will handle if one party or the other wants more.

  • If you see him/her with someone else will your ego be able to stay checked at the door?

  • What if it begins as a fun expedition and a short while along you want out?

Believe me, if everyone is being adult and honest about the situation it can all be worked out.

You being honest with yourself first is the most important part. If you say no, nothing lost, nothing gained. But, if you say yes, have fun - you never know what you might learn. :)

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